Dividing Snacks and Loving Your Neighbour

When my brother and I were younger we shared many things. Or rather, we were required to share many things – some of which we’d rather have kept to ourselves.

Whether it was cake, dividing the very rare can of pop, or a treat of potato chips, we were often told to “divide and share.” With a level of precision that would be admired by NASA engineers, we would measure down to the mm or pour and re-balance portions so that neither would be receiving any more than they other. A ruler actually came out once to divide a dessert. Perhaps the greatest equalizer was that one divided, the other choose between the two resulting portions. I think we probably spent entirely too much time doing this while the pop was going flat or the ice cream was melting.

“Fairness doesn’t always mean sameness” 

There are some places in life where fairness does equate to the same thing being given, taken, shared, or required from everyone, but certainly not all. During a hospital emergency room visit, the split chin from a bicycle accident is trumped by the person arriving in cardiac arrest. A person living with mobility challenges is given parking priority over those who do not. In a school setting, one student’s needs call for something different, and sometimes different looks like more. It seems to be a natural tendency that our children’s first concept of fair is sameness, which home and school eventually have need to round out for wider consideration.

Following God’s command to love your neighbour often does call for us to pursue “everyone gets what they need” rather than “everyone gets the same thing.” It is far from simple for us to make this subtle shift, however when we do so we see pettiness being surpassed by empathy, and selfishness giving way to compassion.

SJ